Category Archives: As Seen On TV

Bret Michaels New RV Show

Suckkaaassss. This show is a cross between that show Pimp My Ride and Extreme Home Makeover. Like a white trash Extreme Home Makeover. And you’re off your rocker if you think I’m not going to watch this. Maybe not on the regular, but at least once to say that I did it. Bret Michaels calling people suckers, drop kicking windshields, and rolling up with double screw guns? Sold.

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There is a fine line between creative and crazy, and Bret Michaels is about to blurr it! Lead singer, pussy slayer, carpenter. “It’s about havin’ fun and gettin’ it done.” Preach. Sundays at 9pm on the Travel Channel.

$500 Worth of Sex Toys Stolen From Some Hotties Trunk

Damn, sluts! Just a heartbreaking story. All the handwork, loading up on all types of “goodies,” for nothing. In the blink of a dick, some shifty crook swoops in and fleas the scene with all of your dildos and penis straws. Such a shame. Ill tell you one thing, Chlesey has some brass balls showing up to do an interview about this story. What a little minx. Glad to see the community is rallying around her and making donations in these desperate times. Inspirational stuff, really.

Miguel at the BBMA

Sweet jump loser. What exactly was the plan here? His ass barely made it onto the other side of the crowd, let alone stick the landing. Not even close. This the type of shit that you sort out during rehearsal. If he tried this jump 10 times, I’m confident he’d successfully land on his feet zero times. This was fucked from jump street. Sweet move after the fact too, snuggling up with the female Hagrid and a bunch of bro’s. Get lost Miguel.

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Pit Boss


Briefly: Pit Boss is a show about a guy who goes by the name of “Shorty” that owns a pitbull rescue in LA. He is a little person, and his 3 employees are also little people. If you didn’t know they prefer to be called “little people” and not “midgets.” Anyway, this guy Shorty is a real hard ass, always smoking cigars and generally, being a dick to everyone.

This show is hilarious because pitbulls are 100% the most athletic dog in the world. I say that having done zero research. Its just common knowledge. And little people are the slowest animal in the world. Thats not me taking a shot at little folks either, its just a fact. The list goes 1) Tortoise 1a) Midgets. I mean, little people. The contrast between the two makes for great tv. If a dog ever escapes or gets a little too wild, the show really gets good. Between the little people bickering with Shorty, and the pitbulls running a muck, this show never fails. There has been 6 seasons of this show. I’ve seen about 4 episodes total, but I’m willing to stand by this program.

Do yourself a favor and check out these clips. You won’t regret it.


Shorty is a wuss!

You can’t take anyone serious when they’re wearing fucking spock ears

TLC’s My Crazy Obsession: TROLL LADY

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Daily Mail: Mother-of-one with crazy troll obsession owns over 3,000 dolls and even has her own ‘troll sanctuary’ where she dresses up like her pink-haired collectables. Ugly, flame-haired plastic dolls became one of the United States’ biggest toy fads in the early 1960s. And although they are usually the plaything of small children, one grown woman is so obsessed with trolls dolls that she owns over 3,000. And mother-of-one Michelle Kerrins’ obsession shows no sign of abating.

The 38-year-old began her crazy obsession when she was just 10 years old and now spends at least four days a week scouring flea markets and thrift stores for yet more, usually snapping up at least three new ones a week. And whenever long suffering husband Dean complains, Michelle puts on her special troll patterned bikini – which she refuses to wear in a pool for fear the chlorine will ruin it – and flirts with him. However, Dean draws the line at getting close to Michelle when she puts on her troll mask.

Daughter Delaney, 14, is more understanding and even helps her mother undertake the mammoth task of cleaning the trolls and photographing each of them so they can be catalogued. Speaking about her love of trolls on TLC’s My Crazy Obsession, Michelle said: ‘Trolls make me really happy when they are all looking at me.


Never watch shows like this because they just piss me off. People just going completely off the deep-end, like that show Intervention. Show fucking sucks. Im not into the business of watching human train wrecks (i.e Teen Mom). Jersey Shore gets a pass, but thats another story.

Back to this wackjob. 3,000 is an enormous number. Especially when used in the context of troll ownership. She spends at least four days a week scouring flea markets and thrift stores.” Yeah, no shit. This is exactly the type of lady you’d expect to find in a flea market. Walking around looking for troll paint and troll masks and all that shit. You can tell a lot by looking into someone’s eyes. And THESE are fucking flea market, troll hoarding eyes if I ever seen ’em:


Yikes. And is she really going to complain that her husband isn’t a troll fucker? Is that what this is about? Give me a break! Give fucking Dean a break! You should be happy anybody can actually tolerate you and your colossal gang of trolls. Those things are gross, lady. This guy Dean must be a complete loser to stick around this charade.

Poor Delaney, too. Photographing and cleaning trolls at the age of 14? Good luck in life.